Lessons

My Precious Child, 

I drank before I was 21. I broke curfew... a lot. I stretched out my sister's clothes on more occasions than I could count. I stole a handful of peanuts from a bin at the grocery store. I broke my toe kicking an ex-boyfriend. I lied to my parents about how I broke said toe. I made up a conspiracy theory to get a free sucker in 4th grade. Long story. I manipulated my teacher to get out of gym class. I drove way too fast down gravel roads. I hit a car during Driver's Ed. 

All true. 

But every single time I got myself into trouble, when that lump was forming in my throat, my palms were sweating, and I felt that there was no way out, I remembered that there was always a safe place. Home. 

Now my parents were not the "my kid would NEVER" type parents. There didn't make excuses for me. They didn't swoop in to save my ass by blaming anyone else. They didn't let me slide because I had a good enough justification. They were the "own up and take responsibility" parents while also being full of love and compassion. There was never screaming. Name-calling. Grounding. But they sure did get creative.

They heard about me drinking at a party the night before? Well rise and shine at 7 am on a Saturday because there is yard work to do and the days-a-wasting. Let me preface by saying yard work was not exactly a staple for me in the Wold household. I was down with the loading/unloading of the dishwasher, dusting, laundry, etc. Yet on this particular occasion my dad saw it the perfect time to let me take over his usual responsibilities. And I couldn't have hated it more.

But after weeding and mowing and trimming in the yard all morning, the hot summer sun beating down on my pale shoulders, my dad came out with a big glass of cold water, pulled me into his side, and hugged me in a way that only a loving parent can. 

"You're done, punky."

There were unspoken rules in the Wold home, not unlike many other homes I know. If you make a mistake, you own up to it. If you make a mess, you clean it up. If you tell a lie, you come clean. But even when it's a big mistake, a huge mess, or an awful lie... you are always loved. There are no mistakes, messes, or lies bad enough to stop the love in this family. Forgiveness wins out every single time. 

And that's what I hope for you, my beautiful child. When you are angry, I will listen. When you are lonely, I will be there. When you are sad, I will hold you. When you are heartbroken, I will resist every temptation to find whoever hurt you and give them a good "talking to." Because you are strong. I love you so much that I will let you take responsibility for the mistakes you make. I will allow you to clean up your own messes and ask forgiveness for your lies. But I will be there to hear you, hold you, and love you. I'm not going anywhere. 

Always and Forever, 

Mom